M A C V A Y S I A

So today we’re leaving China.

There are many things about my time here that make me glad I’m leaving:

The persistent frustrations I experienced in my position as head of a college’s department of foreign languages. It’s difficult not to write at length about that, but I’ll try to resist because if I let loose, it will be the longest post I’ve ever written. The mismanagement, miscommunication, racism, politics, incompetence, disrespect…OK, I’ll stop now.

The constant struggle not to get ripped off. I’ve written about this a couple of times. I am now the proud owner of a fake 10RMB note, a fake 50RMB note, and more recently a fake 100RMB note. The last one is a real disappointment because I know I got it from the HSBC ATM, but there’s no way they’re going to replace it with a new one if I go there and tell them. So it looks like those notes are all souvenirs. And then, of course, there’s the fact that as foreigners we’ve been targets for cons and rip-offs since we first stepped foot on Chinese soil. Forunately we’ve managed to escape being ripped off in any major way, but even the small cases tick me off.

The crowds. I don’t think this one needs a long explanation. This is China. I’m from Canada. Nuff said. You do get used to the crowds after a while, but I won’t miss them.

The spitting. I didn’t get used to that. Especially on the bus. I guess nose-blowing (I’m talking about just covering one nostril and letting it rip here) falls into the same category.

The peeing. Oh God, the peeing. I don’t think there was a time when we went out and didn’t see kids peeing right in front of us, on the sidewalk, the side of the road, in the bushes, in the entrance to the supermarket, in front of restaurants, etc. This was made worse by the occasional inclusion of poop.

The unsanitary conditions of many places. Our college is on the outskirts of the city, in an area where every building is half-finished, garbage is piled everywhere, chickens peck at trash and drink from sewer drains, and food is stored, prepared, and cooked in very questionable ways.

The poor quality of just about everything. Things are cheap in China, but so is the quality. The room I’m sitting in now is a good example. My side of the bed has a crater in it that’s so deep I’m almost in a sitting position while I sleep. I’m not fat, but for some reason that side of the bed has been sinking lower and lower. Then there’s the toilet seat, which suddenly came off. The desk drawers, which just fall out. The refrigerator, which stopped closing properly. The steam iron, which stopped working altogether. The steam iron I bought to replace it, which doesn’t get hot enough. The door to our room, which keeps coming loose. The chair I’m sitting in now, which is about to dump me onto the floor any minute now. Clothes that unravel after only a few washes. Shoes that fall apart after about a month. I could go on and on. Things here are just bloody cheap. A friend even had a kettle that burst into flames before her very eyes. I guess what they say is true: you get what you pay for. Not everything that’s made in China is of poor quality, but the things that are good are really expensive.

The weather. I thought this place would have a less extreme climate than Malaysia, but it seems I was wrong. In the winter it doesn’t get nearly as cold as in Canada, but at least in Canada when it’s cold outside it’s warm inside. Here it’s the same temperature whether you’re in your bed or on the street. It doesn’t rain all winter except for maybe one or two sprinkles; then in spring it rains every day. It gets so wet and the air so humid that even the walls and floors stay wet for weeks. Then the summer comes and the air gets damn hot, with the humidity never really going away. Everything gets mouldy. Everything. And when you wash your clothes, they just never dry. I think the only pleasant time here is autumn, which seems to last only a few weeks. Malaysia’s almost unbearably hot and humid, but at least it’s consistent.

But you know, I am an optimist, so I can’t focus on the negative things. There are plenty good things about my time in China:

The friendships that developed here. We became good friends with people who have been our colleagues and students, and I will really miss them when we leave. I’ll especially miss Ice, my ‘brother from a Chinese mother,’ who has helped us a lot and has been a great friend to me. I’ll really miss the time I got to spend with Ice. I’ll also miss Alain and Jija and our weekend outings. Of course, I know I’ll see Alain and Jija again soon. And I hope I’ll see Ice again too. Because I’d really like to have a chance to beat him at table tennis.

The wonderful cultural experiences. We had a great time getting out and interacting with people. Every day provided us with interesting experiences; even the most mundane daily activities often led to interesting interactions that showed us many sides of the fascinating cultures of China. And it was cool being able to pick up a bit of the language and be able to interact with people in it. Sure, my Chinese is still laughable, but to a beginner, every little meaningful interaction is memorable.

The effect China had on our marriage. Of course we loved each other before we came here, and we’ve always been close. But it seems we’ve grown so much closer since coming to China. I was worried at first about the fact that we’d be together almost 24/7, but instead of driving each other crazy, we actually grew closer to the point that we now can’t imagine being apart for any extended period of time. I really think Leen is an amazing woman and I’m really proud of her for everything she’s done here. She quit her job as a dentist with the Malaysian government to follow me to China and teach English, even though she’s a learner herself with no prior teaching experience. She jumped into the unknown and did very well, quickly becoming a favourite of the students. She earned the respect of just about everyone here and stayed positive despite some of the frustrations we faced. Someone once said you could drop Leen into any place and she’d make friends with everyone there. I think that is definitely true. I’ll never forget the night she got up on a stage in front of hundreds of students and sang Sha Na Na by Amy Mastura. She was definitely ‘bagai Sang Suria’ that night and every other day that we spent together. She’s my best friend and I’m glad we were able to experience China together. Yesterday was our fifth wedding anniversary. Looking forward to many more!

The lessons I learned in China. I learned a lot here, from both the good experiences and the bad ones. I learned to talk less and listen more (for a brief time there was someone here who did nothing but talk, mostly about himself, and seeing how annoying that was made me feel like keeping my mouth shut unless I had something important or really interesting to say). I learned a lot about leadership. I learned how to be more efficient. I learned the importance of being thick-skinned. I learned a lot about myself. I hope the lessons I learned will serve me well long after I’ve left this place.

Vegetables. I ate a lot of veggies here. I’ll especially miss broccoli, which is really expensive in Malaysia but cheap enough here that I could eat it every day. Sure, the food here is often dirty. But it’s cheap, and it seems eating dirty vegetables has been better for me than eating none at all.

And, of course…

Our baby. God willing, he’ll come into this world in a couple of months and grow to be healthy and strong. And I’ll always remind him that he was ‘made in China.’

We had quite a time here. Now it’s time to go back to Malaysia. My short-term plan: to clear the clutter out of my life and focus on the important priorities—my family, my religion, my job, my writing, my friends, etc. Long-term plan: who knows? We’re going to give Malaysia about five more years. After that we’re either going to stay there for good or move back to Canada. You just never know where we’ll end up.

Zai jian, Zhong Guo!